Words now banned by The Guardian … good name for a newspaper out of “1984”

David Davis

From last week’s Spectator:-

According to Rod Liddle, these are some of the words and phrases banned by the Guardian:

active homosexual; career women; Third World; blacks; Asians; Australasia; Bangalore; primitive African tribes; crippled; in a wheelchair; hare lip; ethnic minorities; handicapped; spinster; committed suicide; gypsies; Bombay; illegitimate daughter; air hostess; Siamese twins; Calcutta; deaf ears; illegal asylum seeker; province of Northern Ireland; grandmother; bachelor.

Full article:



  1. A friend of mine, an active homosexual and his sister, very much the career woman, decided to take a holiday.

    They wanted to see life in the raw, back to basics so decided on a trip to a Third World country, somewhere in the Australisian archipeligo.

    They chose an island between Australia and Indonesia for their trip, which was mainly populated by a mixture of blacks and Asians, imports from colonial days.

    During their visit they ventured out to the interior of the island and happened upon a small village, the village elder was an old man, crippled, with a hair lip, in a wheelchair.

    He explained that although he was handicapped, it did nothing to stop him being an elder. His one regret however was that his wife, from one of the indigenous tribes, considered by most now to be ethnic minorities, had committed suicide after an incident with a roving band of gypsies, for which no-one was to blame.

    His illegitimate daughter, a spinster, who was now an air hostess working on flights between Bombay and Calcutta with the occasional stop in Bangalore, had given birth to Siamese twins and had been banished, much in the same way that primitive African Tribes would have done.

    The local children called them deaf ears and other names designed to hurt, so in her quest to give her children as normal a life as possible, had decided to go to the province of Northern Ireland, to see her grandmother and her son, who was a bachelor.

    Unable to get a visa, she entered Northern Ireland as an illegal asylum seeker, believing that this would at least provide health care to the Siamese twins.

    And they all lived happily ever after, knowing that if you ignore stupid bans, ignore people who try to control you, then the world is your oyster.

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